Good-bye

The one I love

just told me good-bye,

I feel so alone

I want to cry.

Our time together

it felt so good,

I was sure of love

and where we stood.

We laughed and played

and even cried some,

but never a thought

that this would come.

I gave it my all

even bared my soul,

only to be left in

this dark lonely hole.

Why should I bother

and go thru this pain,

to find someone and

maybe another heart stain.

Getting to know a person

is so much damn trouble,

but when it works

life’s joy can double.

Now what shall I do

where should I go,

my heart is aching

for love to flow.

For a short time

I lived alone,

finding each day

cold as a stone.

Then came my friend

so caring and giving,

making each day

something worth living.

A time soon came

and I moved back home,

but our bond should endure

with feelings we’d known.

So someone tell me

give me a clue,

how can such distance

destroy love between two.

Maybe I should learn

that love is dear,

just look for friendship

in a future so unclear.

Love has found me

thru Mother and home,

even with this hurt

I’m not really alone.

But someone I love

just told me good-bye,

and just for now

it’s all right to cry.

Gary R. Cramer

September 10, 1987

Body Decay

What are these pains

I’m feeling each day,

is my body decaying

in yet another way.

First it was my teeth

giving in to the fight,

a garden of cavities

a dentist’s delight.

At last I think

I’ve saved what’s left,

but a mouth full of fillings

gives a jaw some heft.

Then it was the hair

I always wanted more,

but with rising age

it only grew on the floor.

I brush and shampoo

using warm and hot,

waging a war against

a shiny bald spot.

With all my efforts

I have little to show,

all I’ve accomplished is

to make my forehead grow.

Next was my belt line

always growing in girth,

making me ponder

am I going to give birth.

Like a museum my

wardrobe tells a story,

showing belts 32 to 44

a waist with no glory.

Once had bulk of muscle

from lifting weights,

now turned to fat

can life have worse fates.

Now a little work

around the yard,

and my body is screaming

from moving all the lard.

At one time I claimed

overweight by 10 percent,

now grown to twenty

A fact I truly resent.

Little by little the

body gives up the fight,

growing more and more tired

and earlier in the night.

But still there is hope

I won’t give up on me,

I still have my hearing

and I can even see.

Maybe next the muscles

they feel so tender,

no not my memory

but I can’t remember.

Gary R. Cramer

July 20, 1987

Away For So Long For My Step-Daughter

Away for so long

and now I’m back,

are they still my friends

or will they attack.

Before I left

I was really cool,

we ran together

and got by in school.

Sure there were others

worked and studied hard,

no smokes or drinks

they stayed on guard.

Who was wrong

and who was right,

all that mattered

was party out of sight.

Away I went

to another place,

to clean up my act

and find some space.

Well now I’m back

and I feel clean,

not all trashed out

and feeling mean.

Feeling alone and

wanting to fit in,

I miss old friends

resistance may be thin.

If there is one thing

I must discover,

it’s my self esteem

I need to recover.

I’ve grown a lot

with reflections of the past,

the lessons were hard

the knowledge will last.

It hurts to think

I may lose those friends,

but then real friends

are there till the end.

Through out a life

many people come and go,

there’s always so many

more good ones to know.

Do I go with the old

or should I seek out new,

I must take my time

and be sure of what I do.

I can hope for the best

or just wait and see,

whatever their choice

I must be true to me.

Friendship is valued

but real love is gold,

my family is behind me

and they love me I’m told.

Gary R. Cramer

June 12, 1987