Bear Republic Brewing

Bear Republic Brewing

was its actual name,

cold brew and hot grub

were the source of it’s fame.

Don’t get me wrong

I have no bias,

but this is the place

I left the highest.

It started with a glass

that soon grew to a mug,

from a waitress frown

she replaced it with a shrug.

Then came the onion rings

so crisp and hot,

my mouth cried in protest

because I was totally shot.

I recall a burger

at some various part,

that left me with gas

rivaling a pickled egg fart.

The grease and beer

all mixed with a flair,

the next table asked

what’s that stench in the air.

Somewhere around five

or maybe it was six,

Jack Daniel’s called me

and put my butt in a fix.

They cleared my count straws

I think it was around seven,

I couldn’t dare a guess

because my thirst was in heaven.

The ladies room is small

how I got there I really don’t know,

but a dodge, slip and fall

allowed a miss a lass did throw.

I slipped back into the bar

and froze in a trance,

someone screamed

where are his pants.

Didn’t matter so much as

there was plenty to grab,

now the lights were dimming

all turning so drab.

At that very moment

the juke box came on,

Patsy Cline singing Crazy

“hey that’s my song”.

From off in a distance

I did hear a strange noise,

Alas it was my buddies

those uniformed boys.

All dressed in blue

each sporting a tin star,

so stern and frowning

as I stood on the bar.

One reached for his cuffs

another heard my call,

he whispered to his brother

just wait - he’ll fall.

Sure enough a beer nut

and shot glass,

tripped me up

and I fell on my ass.

Patching up my pride

I called for my staff,

all of the patrons

began to loudly laugh.

I bowed and waved

a broad smile on my lips,

as I wagged my finger

“Be careful of those sips”.

Bear Republic Brewing

was its actual name,

cold brew and hot grub

were the source of it’s fame.

Gary R. Cramer

January 22, 2015 BTW It never happened.